The New Year

I take a moment to reflect on the year 2013 it was a whirlwind graduation from medical school moving to a new place, moving onto a new stage in life, making money!!! I feel as if I have been tested and tried to my limit and then I humble realize that my burdens are light and the Lord as not ask to much of me. I don't know if is is relief or sadness that brings me to say the Lord doesn't expect much of me with the trials I have been given in life because I look around me and see so many suffering so much more. I read something today that has made me want to make a lifetime change. Friends that where in the same ward and graduating class as my husband in undergrad lost one of their precious children. I pray I am up for the challenge  to change because changing oneself is the hardest thing in life to do. I want to cherish my family time more. I get so caught up in getting my list down for the day, getting things accomplish I put above taking that extra time to enjoy my children. I need to take the extra time to smother then in love and kindness to hold my babies a little longer so that they know how much I love them. Be a little less angry and impatient when something is not going the way I want it to go. Lead my children in the way they should be as adults, if it is expected of them it is expected of me, I must not loss my temper at these precious children of God, you never know when they will be gone. How precious life is and our families.

I was promise and kind and understanding heart, a heart of empathy, to help others in my life and I truly do have that gift. I feel the pains of others so acutely I often wish there was more that I could do to help alleviate the problems but more often then not it is a meal and a clean house and a shoulder to cry on is all the I can be. I sit on the side lines and wish I could take their burden from them because surely the have suffered enough. Sometimes the emotions are so acute and the pain I feel for others is so big I have to bare it deep down inside of me because I feel like I will be swallowed up by it. I put on my tough face as I call it and do the things my brothers always told me suck it up and quite being a wimp but inside I hear compassion is need more in the world don't hide it.  My other resolutions is to be more compassionate.

I have a loving husband who is so amazing. He works so hard and is such a great example to people around him. He works so hard and he worries so much about his family I know I can't say it enough. Being a wife of a medical doctor is not easy they are gone all the time. I have seen the other side of the curtain in the medical field and see how hard doctors work to help the people around them. In this changing world doctors are having a harder time helping people because the only ones that have to take responsibility are the Doctors. The none complete patients, the insurance not wanting to pay because something was not documented just right,  the government trying to control what the doctors can and can't do, and the lawyers getting involved in things they are out of their depth and breath that they don't understand but someone has to pay. James has so much responsibility on him I worry so much for him. I he is a great doctor or so I  am told by all of the people who work with him but a know my husband and I am not surprised I always new he would be a great doctor.

Courtney is so sensitive to everything that happens around her she internalizes everything and then it eats at who she is. I have to remind myself that she is not like me and she can't take the presser that I can take or that she takes it different. I handle a frontal assault well but she can't handle me pushing her up front. She need coxing and gentle persuasion. She is doing well in school and as adjusted to Florida weather; I think she was born to be a Floridian. Second grade has been good for her she is loving reading, math is okay; it is better if she does it on the computer then paper. Swimming, bike riding, playing at the park, playing with friends, and family feels her time. We have been to Disney World a lot this year and she (WE) still loves it.

William is my great scientist he loves science and the kid ask so many hard questions already and he seem to understand the answers which is even more scary. He "loves" school, I really don't know if he likes it but he goes. He gets excited about somethings and other things he is dragged kicking and screaming to do. Math he is a wiz at but he just doesn't want to learn his letters. He know his letters but he is not going to let you in on the secret but he accidentally slips up every once in a while. He does love the playstation and the little time that dad does have is the male bond time with William. (Dad does father daughter bonding it is usually something other then playstation, just thought I would throw that in there.) They get along best when they are playing playstation and doing science together. William for his birthday wants a microscope, they are not cheap, because him and dad are going to look a cells.

Kathrine is my mine me. She is strong like me in many ways. She is loving like me. She need lots of attention with lots of  hugs and kisses. She is always moving which is not a new thing to any of my kids if they hold still for to long I know there is something wrong with them. She is so ready to be in school I think she would be reading already if she had a better mother, but that is neither here no there. I hope to still have her reading by the end of the year. She does really well with her letters and like the rest of her siblings she is picking up math pretty quick. She is my little shadow and she hates to be separated from mom even if it is to have the pleasure of dads company. It is kind of fun having my little shadow, I am very scared to be away from her next year and I will miss so much of her  (My kids) life because they will be in school. I hope to voluntary so much they will not miss me very much. They might have to ask me to leave the school.

For those of you who have been reading and are unsure about what is happening in our life. Life is great my family is very blessed. We could not ask for more. We love and appreciate my extended family We don't know what we would do without them. We love all of our new friend we have made and hope to make a lot more. We love our ward James and I are both teachers. He teaches Priesthood and I teach Gospel Doctrine. Yes I said that right I have a heart attack every week when I am preparing my lessons. I love the gospel and as a teacher I have learned so much more. We love the Lord with all our hearts and will always stay close to him. We pray the we can do all the thing the Lord wants us to do. To Share the good new of the Gospel to all the world, to help with family history and temple work, and to build up the kingdom of God on the earth today. We have felt as a family the Lord giving us a call to raise the bar to do more and be better. To live the gospel example in our lives that when people meet us they know that we are disciple of Christ because we are like him. I hope that we can rise to the challenge because it will be a lot of work for me. But here is to improving yourself for our benefit and others.